"Up from here" Chapter 13: Mom’s Life
Luke 9:50 (New International Version)
"Do not stop him," Jesus said, "for whoever is not against you is for you."
Mom was born on February 27, 1924 in St. Paul, Minnesota as EDITH KATHRYN DONALDSON to John Donaldson and Barbara Irene O’Mally. Mom had one full brother Richard Donaldson and two half brothers, Gary Donaldson, Jack Donaldson and one half sister Carolyn Donaldson, all from her father who lived in Seattle, Washington.
Mom spent her teen years going to High School as the class of 1943 in the Malin, Oregon and Tulelake, California of Northern California and Southern Oregon. Where my Mom’s brother Dick later retired and moved with his wife Jean to Madras, Oregon with their four children and my cousins Barbs, Cathy, Mickey and Patrick Donaldson.
My Moms mother was killed in 1938 in a deer hunting accident on Timber Mountain in Alturas, California in the Modoc National Forest when my Mom was 14 years old and her brother Dick was 11 years old. My Mom’s last wish was to find her mothers’ grave site and put a marker on it before she passed away. The one thing my Mom wanted the most in this life was a mother, the one thing she could not have that my brothers and sisters took for granted, along with their children.
The deer hunting accident happened near Timber Mountain and my grandmother was taken to the CC camp where she passed away on September 19, 1938. Edith Kathryn Garland (Donaldson) and Dick Donaldson were living with their stepfather Les Thompson in Malin, Oregon when the accident occurred. Edith Kathryn Garland (Donaldson) attended her high school class reunions whenever possible located in Malin, Oregon. Edith Kathryn Garland (Donaldson) was very good friends with Loral Kenyon of the Malin Lost River High School and Tulelake High School from 1938 to 1943 a large farmer of potato’s.
My Mom had a total of 8 children, seven that lived as Mom’s first child was still born. Mom gave birth to three girls and five boys and by birth order, I was the 6th child who was born on September 5th, 1954 in Long Beach, California and the baby in California. There was in order of birth Sharon, Ted, Jerry, Cherie, Richard, James, Patrick and the baby Darlalu. Sharon who died at birth, Jerry who was adopted out and Patrick and Darlalu who grew up with their father in Macon, Georgia.
Where do I start as I sit here trying to put to words about the life of my dear mother and what she meant not only to me but to all her loved ones, relatives and friends. Have you ever tried to do your best and feel you did the best you could to the point of saying to yourself and others, “I may not be the best but I do the best I can”? You do not know what you have until it is gone, forever! As tears begin to fall from my eyes as I think back to the love my Mother had for me and me the love I had for her.
In 1998 Mom, my nephew David Scott and I lived in a three-bedroom house on Denton Way for $650.00 a month, plus utilities, split 3-ways in what is known as the Enterprise area of Redding, California. This is when I first noticed Mom was having problems with her memory. What could be considered the beginning stages of dementia and Alzheimer’s where there is memory loss with forgetting recently learned information one of the most common early signs of Dementia where a person begins to forget more often and is unable to recall the information later. I had no idea what dementia was, less well Alzheimer’s. I just knew Mom was going to need someone to take care of her as there was no way we were going to put her in a nursing home.
Then on Thanksgiving Day November 26th, 1998 in Redding, California at Liquor Barn an Earthquake happened. The day my life was transformed, forever. In summation, forever can be a lifetime. Just like an eternity is a very long time. One never knows just how long we have to live on this earth. One moment your speeding right along living your life to the fullest and not paying attention to anything, aside from, what is going on around you. Then one day your life alliterates in a twinkling of an eye. Just like mine did when it was disrupted never the less? I was diagnosed as having PTSD from the Earthquake from a doctor at Everyday Health Care in Redding, California.
I knew someone would have to start taking care of Mom eventually. I just did not think it would be me. The person that should have been the one to do it was my eldest sister; due to the fact that my Mom always favored my sister and my sister’s children, above all of us boys. I knew someone, someday would have to be the one to take care of her and I always worried about Mom, even when I was in South Korea teaching English as a second Language (ESL).
My whole life since February 22, 2007 has been turned upside down and every which way, but up. It was back on Mother's Day in May of 1999 when I first moved in with my Mom at the Kutras Gardens Senor Citizens apartment complex in Redding, California. I had just come up from Chico, California on a Greyhound bus, after being homeless and Sleeping in Bidwell Park. I was homeless due to a workman’s compensation case I was fighting in Pro Per against an Act of God because of an earthquake that happened on Thanksgiving Day November 26th, 1998 and I did not want to be homeless in Redding, California where all the family lived.
This was not to be the first time that my whole life had been turned up side down and every which way, but loose. Like I had said, I had moved up from Chico, California on none other than Mother’s day 1999, not only to have a place to stay but to help Mom as much as I could; because I was aware at the time she was having memory problems back on Denton Way in Redding, California when I lived there with my nephew David Scott, my Mom’s grandson.
My sister and her children were the one’s closest to my Mom and it was no wonder because they were the one’s that did the most for Mom in return, other than me being the baby and the spoiled sibling in California, who did more than his fair share of helping Mom, more than my older brothers Ted Dickinson and Richard Garland ever would or be expected to. Cher Carder my sister's youngest son Brett was about ten years old, and her eldest son David was diagnosed being mentally ill with Paranoid Schizophrenia.
My sisters' eldest son, my nephew and I did not always see eye to eye, when it came to my Mom. And that would cause family problems with my sister, due to the fact that I felt my nephew David was taking advantage of my Mom; because of her favoritism towards him and the fact he knew she would not remember things, such as when he borrowed money and never made an attempt to pay her back, knowing very well, she would write it down and then forget where she wrote it down, as to how much he had borrowed and how much he never paid back to her. That did not go well with my sister when I would mention it to her, about her son David borrowing money from Mom and not paying it back. Naturally my sister always defended her son first and above anything or anyone, including my Mom.
I tried to get other family members to help me with Mom and not one of them would lift a finger. They had no problem picking up Mom and expecting me to get her ready when they wanted to visit with her. They would call about an hour before to give me a heads up that they were coming by to pick her up knowing very well it would not give me time to plan to go anywhere, nor would they give me a time when they thought they might be bringing her back so I could be there when they brought her back home. Then other relatives expected me to bring her to their house for a visit but had no time to come and pick her up or bring her back. They expected me to do it all and so I did. I took over the responsibility and from there on I made all the decisions for Mom.
We were evicted from the Kutras Gardens Senior Apartment complex in Redding, California for a complaint over a handicap parking space and for violating the lease for running a business. I represented us in an unlawful detainer in Pro Per for Mom and I. I also filed a complaint with HUD and reported the situation to United States Senator Dianne Feinstein Office for discrimination against a senor in a senior citizen apartment complex. We ended up being homeless and my Mom did not know any different so I figured if we were going to be homeless and stay in motel, why not go on a vacation and visit my Moms’ brother in Madras, Oregon and see if we wanted to relocate to Oregon. We had put everything in storage and headed north. Mom would not have known the difference anyway with her dementia. As far as my Mom knew or was concerned we were on a vacation.
Taking the trip to Madras, Oregon would give me a chance to get more information on the location of her Mothers’ grave site from my uncle and aunt, who still had their full capacities and to meet relatives we had not seen in years. Including first cousins and second cousins for me and for my Mom her nephews and nieces and her great nephews. We stayed in a motel for about a week and I decided that it was not the place to stay, especially after my aunt as much told me they did not want us living in Madras, Oregon and they could not help us. I did not go there for a hand out, we were not destitute. Mom and I still had money in the bank. We left after a week visit and headed to Klamath Falls, Oregon after the information I received from the relatives in Madras, Oregon about the location of my grand-mothers’ grave in Klamath Falls, Oregon. When we arrived in Klamath Falls, Oregon after leaving my uncle and aunt in Madras, Oregon. We were driving down 6th street when Mom saw a sign on a Motel 6 and she said, "They have weekly rates". We turned around and I rented a room at Motel 6 Motels, Klamath Falls, Oregon (a handicap room) for a week. I could research and try and find my Moms' Mothers’ cemetery and look for a place to live in the Klamath Falls, Oregon and Malin, Oregon. I could also check the Tulelake, California area where my Mom went to High school in Malin, Oregon and where my Mom spent her teenage years growing up. Mom went study with Lowell Kenyan (her boyfriend at the time) that was one of the big farmers son’s and major employers for the area in the Tulelake Basin at the time.
Alturas, CA
Please Oh Lord!
Heal my Mother.
Please help to give her strength back.
She needs to eat more to get better.
Please Lord; take away the pain that she has now.
Oh Lord, I have done everything I can do now; it is in your hands Lord.
Please let my mother get well soon.
Thank you for all your prayers.
And may God bless all of you.
James G.
From Light-A-Candle.ORG
Edith Kathryn Garland Born Feb 27,1924 Died Feb 22, 2007
·Edith K. Garland was loved by many people in the City of Alturas from the Alturas Medical Clinic to the Modoc Medical Center Emergency Room Technicians. Edith also spent a short time at the Modoc Senior Citizen Lunch Program on 4th Street in Alturas, California.
·Edith K. Garland was also called a sweet heart and she was loved by many in Modoc County from the City of Alturas, to the City of Tulelake, California and in the Newell, California area.
·Edith K. Garland also spent time at the Tulelake Senior Lunch Program at the Honker in Tulelake, California. And even at the Butte Valley Health Center and Butte Valley Dental Center in Doris, California as well as one visit to the Doris Senior Lunch Program during a Special Christmas Program.
·Edith K. Garlands' mother Barbara Irene O’Malley was killed in a deer hunting accident on Sept 19, 1938 when Edith K. Donaldson was 14 years old and her brother Richard (Dick) Donaldson was 11 years old.
The deer hunting accident happened near Timber Mountain and my grandmother Barbara Irene O’Malley was taken to the CC camp where she passed away on September 19, 1938.
· Edith lived in Alturas, California from October 2005 to
February 2007.
· Edith lived in Tulelake/Newell, California from 2002 to
2005.
· Edith spent her teen years in Malin, Oregon and Tulelake,
California area.
· Edith’s maiden name was Donaldson.
· Edith’s mother’s name was Barbara Irene O’Malley Edith K.
Donaldson (Garland) and her younger brother Richard
(Dick) Donaldson were living with their stepfather Les
Thompson in Malin, Oregon when the deer hunting accident
occurred.
Edith K. Donaldson (Garland) attended her high school class reunions whenever possible located in Malin, Oregon.
Edith K. Donaldson (Garland) was very good friends with Loral Kenyon of the Malin Lost River High School and Tulelake high schools in 1936-1938.
Edith’s sister-in-law was Jean Donaldson who passed away in 2010 or 2011 in Madras, Oregon. and Edith’s' brother Dick Donaldson passed away in November 2004 in Madras, Oregon.
Edith’s best life long friend of over 50 years Ruth Meder, still lives in Nvero, California.
Edith was born In St Paul, MN
· Edith’s other close relatives and senior citizen friends
reside in Redding, California.
· Edith also had friends in Long Beach, California and Los
Angeles, California.
· Edith spent years before relocating to Redding,
California to the Tulelake/Butte Valley.
· Edith’s best life long cherished friend of over 50 years
Ruth Meder of Nvero, California.
· Edith passed away at Mercy Medical Center in Redding,
California on February 22, 2007.
As Time Passes
As the time passes for each of us here together in this very moment of our lives with its ups and downs.
From one day to the next. Not knowing what tomorrow may bring for what we have experienced in the past? And what we hope to accomplish in the future along this short trail we call life…
In the end we hope we have met as many people along the way that we can love and that they love us? Then the path was well taken for each footstep along the way that we made with each new passing day...
To reach the goal at the end of the road of knowing we loved and we were loved for who we are and not what others thought we were.
James Garland Copyright 1999.
Dementia
What is dementia?
We all forget things as we get older. Many older people have a slight loss of memory that does not affect their daily lives. But memory loss that gets worse may mean that you have dementia.
Dementia is a loss of mental skills that affects your daily life. It can cause problems with your memory and how well you can think and plan. Usually dementia gets worse over time. How long this takes is different for each person. Some people stay the same for years. Others lose skills quickly.
Your chances of having dementia rise as you get older. But this does not mean that everyone will get it. Many older adults never get it. By age 85, about 35 out of 100 people have it. That means that 65 out of 100 people this age do not have dementia. And after age 85, even more people will get dementia.
If you or a loved one has memory loss that is getting worse, see your doctor. It may be nothing to worry about. If it is dementia, treatment may help.
What causes dementia?
Dementia is caused by damage to or changes in the brain. Things that can cause dementia include: Strokes, tumors, or head injuries. After Alzheimer's disease, strokes are the most common cause of dementia. This type of dementia is called vascular dementia.
Diseases, such as Parkinson's disease, dementia with Lewy bodies, and frontotemporal dementia.
In a few cases, dementia is caused by a problem that can be treated. Examples include having an under active thyroid gland (hypothyroidism), not getting enough vitamin B12, and fluid buildup in the brain (normal-pressure hydrocephalus). In these cases, treating the problem may cure the dementia.
In some people, depression can cause memory loss that seems like dementia. Depression can be treated.
As you age, medicines may affect you more. Taking some medicines together may cause symptoms that look like dementia. Be sure your doctor knows about all of the medicines you take. This means all prescription medicines and all over-the-counter medicines, herbs, vitamins, and supplements.
What are the symptoms?
Usually the first symptom is memory loss. Often the person who has a memory problem does not notice it, but family and friends do. As dementia gets worse:
You may have more trouble doing things that take planning, like making a list and going shopping.
You may have trouble using or understanding words.
You may get lost in places you know well.
Over time, people with dementia may begin to act very different. They may become scared and strike out at others, or they may become clingy and childlike. They may stop brushing their teeth or bathing.
Dementia from WebMD at webmd.com
Alzheimer’s
What is Alzheimer’s disease?
Alzheimer's disease damages the brain. It causes a steady loss of memory and of how well you can speak, think, and carry on daily activities.
Alzheimer's disease always gets worse over time, but how quickly this happens varies. Some people lose the ability to do daily activities early on. Others may still do fairly well until much later in the disease.
Mild memory loss is common in people older than 60. It may not mean that you have Alzheimer’s disease. But if your memory is getting worse, see your doctor. If it is Alzheimer’s, treatment may help.
What causes Alzheimer's disease?
Alzheimer’s disease happens because of changes in the brain. These include lower levels of chemical messengers (neurotransmitters) that help brain cells work properly. What causes these changes is not clear. The risk of getting Alzheimer’s disease increases as you get older. But this does not mean that everyone will get it. By age 85, about 35 out of 100 people have some form of dementia. That means that 65 out of 100 don't have it. Dementia is rare before age 60.
Having a relative with Alzheimer’s raises your risk of getting it, but most people with Alzheimer's disease do not have a family history of it.
What are the symptoms?
For most people, the first symptom of Alzheimer's disease is memory loss. Often the person who has a memory problem does not notice it, but family and friends do. But the person with the disease may also know that something is wrong.
As the disease gets worse, the person may: Have trouble making decisions. Be confused about what time and day it is. Get lost in places he or she knows well. Have trouble learning and remembering new information. Have trouble finding the right words to say what he or she wants to say.
Have more trouble doing daily tasks like cooking a meal or paying bills.
The symptoms of Alzheimer’s get worse slowly over time. A person who gets these symptoms over a few hours or days or whose symptoms suddenly get worse needs to see a doctor right away, because there may be another problem. As people with Alzheimer’s get worse, they may get restless and wander, especially in late afternoon and at night. This is called sun downing. Over time, they may also start to act very different. They may withdraw from family and friends. They may see or hear things that are not really there. They may falsely believe that others are lying, cheating, using them, or trying to harm them. They may strike out at others.
Alzheimer’s disease from WebMD at webmd.com
Brain Aneurysm
What is a brain aneurysm?
A brain (cerebral) aneurysm is a bulging, weak area in the wall of an artery that supplies blood to the brain. In most cases, a brain aneurysm causes no symptoms and goes unnoticed. In rare cases, the brain aneurysm ruptures, releasing blood into the skull and causing a stroke.
When a brain aneurysm ruptures, the result is called a subarachnoid hemorrhage. Depending on the severity of the hemorrhage, brain damage or death may result.
The most common location for brain aneurysms is in the network of blood vessels at the base of the brain called the circle of Willis.
What causes a brain aneurysm?
A person may inherit the tendency to form aneurysms, or aneurysms may develop because of hardening of the arteries (atherosclerosis) and aging. Some risk factors that can lead to brain aneurysms can be controlled, and others can't. The following risk factors may increase your risk of developing an aneurysm or, if you already have an aneurysm, may increase your risk of it rupturing:
Family history. People who have a family history of brain aneurysms are twice as likely to have an aneurysm as those who don't.
Previous aneurysm. About 20% of patients with brain aneurysms have more than one.
Gender. Women are twice as likely to develop a brain aneurysm or to suffer a subarachnoid hemorrhage as men.
Race. African Americans have twice as many subarachnoid hemorrhages as whites.
Hypertension. The risk of subarachnoid hemorrhage is greater in people with a history of high blood pressure (hypertension).
Smoking. In addition to being a cause of hypertension, the use of cigarettes may greatly increase the chances of a brain aneurysm rupturing.
What are the symptoms?
Most brain aneurysms cause no symptoms and may only be discovered during tests for another, usually unrelated, condition. In other cases, an unruptured aneurysm will cause problems by pressing on areas within the brain. When this happens, the person may suffer from severe headaches, blurred vision, changes in speech, and neck pain, depending on the areas of the brain that are affected and the severity of the aneurysm. If you have any of the following symptoms or notice them in someone you know, see a health professional immediately.
Symptoms of a ruptured brain aneurysm often come on suddenly. They may include:
Sudden, severe headache (sometimes described as a "thunderclap" headache that is very different from any normal headache).
Neck pain.
Nausea and vomiting.
Sensitivity to light.
Fainting or loss of consciousness.
Seizures.
How is a brain aneurysm diagnosed?
Because unruptured brain aneurysms often do not cause any symptoms, many are discovered in people who are being treated for a different condition.
If your health professional believes you have a brain aneurysm, you may have the following tests:
Computed tomography (CT) scan. A CT scan can help identify bleeding in the brain.
Computed tomography angiogram (CTA) scan. CTA is a more precise method of evaluating blood vessels than a standard CT scan. CTA uses a combination of CT scanning, special computer techniques, and contrast material (dye) injected into the blood to produce images of blood vessels.
Magnetic resonance angiography (MRA). Similar to a CTA, MRA uses a magnetic field and pulses of radio wave energy to provide pictures of blood vessels inside the body. As with CTA and cerebral angiography, a dye is often used during MRA to make blood vessels show up more clearly.
Cerebral angiogram. During this X-ray test, a catheter is inserted through a blood vessel in the groin or arm and moved up through the vessel into the brain. A dye is then injected into the cerebral artery. As with the above tests, the dye allows any problems in the artery, including aneurysms, to be seen on the X-ray. Although this test is more invasive and carries more risk than the above tests, it is the best way to locate small (less than 5 mm) brain aneurysms.
Brain Aneurysm from WebMD at webmd.com
End of "Up from here" Chapter 13: Mom’s Life
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